Fantastic Four (2005)

Another brief history lesson: In 1994 a studio got Director Roger Corman to film a Fantastic Four movie as fast as possible as they would have other wise lost the rights if they didn’t begin production by a certain date. Corman got it made in time and within budget, but it was never planned to actually see any form of official release. Which is good for him because even by Corman standards (seriously, read up on Roger Corman, his entire film career is incredibly interesting) this was a horrible movie that is honestly so painful I can’t sit through it beginning to end, which is saying a lot because I love bad movies and Mystery Science Theater 3000 (a show that featured many Corman movies).

So round two with the first family of comics shows us how to make a good, bad comic book movie.

The bad: Some little plot holes, missed opportunities, and HORRIBLE portrayal of one of the most loved villains in the Marvel Universe, dare I say of all comics even.

The good: Of all Marvel movies up ‘till now (and so far since) it’s the one that is the most fun. It’s not bogged down with unnecessary emotional storylines (see Spider-Man) or pseudo social commentary (see X-Men), it is just a damn fun movie.

Hands down every comic fan’s biggest complaint about the movie is the portrayal of Dr. Doom. In the comics he is unbearably arrogant (always refers to himself in the third person, made a deal with the devil only because he was so full of himself that he knew he’d be able to break the deal with no consequences), powerful, charismatic, brilliant, and answers to no one. Oh, and he’s not really a doctor as he never actually graduated. In the movie however he’s a quick talking, manipulative business man (and a bit of a scientist though this is only implied), head of Doom Industries, always looking for the best way to line his wallet even at the expense of others. Despite this I think Julian McMahon did a good job with what he was given.

However this all leads to a missed golden opportunity. In the comics whenever anything goes wrong, no matter how obvious it is as to whose fault it is, if something can be remotely linked to Reed Richards, Doom will indeed blame Richards. In the scene where the space station is hit by a cloud of cosmic radiation due to an unforeseen miscalculation by Reed, it would have been absolutely perfect if Doom had instead had the space station secretly moved prior to their arrival so that they wouldn’t have to wait so long for the storm. After which he would have still have blamed Richards.

As for the rest of the cast, kudos. Everyone did a fantastic (HAW!) job, even Jessica Alba, who was clearly cast just to bring in more fanboys. Ian Gruffudd seemed very natural as a genius still not sure of himself. Steeling the show however is a toss up to both Michael Chikalis as Ben Grimm, the Thing and Chris Evans as Johnny Storm, the Human Torch. The toss up is partially due to how well they play off each other and how perfectly it mirrors their comic counter parts, Johnny always antagonizing Ben, Ben lashing back, but the minute things become serious you can tell that they would fight to the death for each other.

A couple plot holes I feel MUST be addressed: The movie goes right from the cosmic storm hitting the station and knocking everyone out, to the crew being back on earth without even a hint as to how that happened (see Director’s Cut notes below). A quick rescue is a ridiculous idea, but it’s better than nothing. And then there’s Sue turning invisible and stripping on the bridge to get past a barricade. The idea is that somehow her being invisible will allow her, Reed, and Johnny to get passed the police, but all she does is turn invisible, strip (turn visible again so we can see her in her underwear, then turn invisible again), then she pushes through the crowd while Reed and Johnny clearly just sneak around the side of an ambulance.

But as a sign of just how fun this movie is, few people even noticed that there’s only one fight scene in the entire movie, and it’s at the very end. Sure there’s some action here and there, but nothing spectacular. That one fight scene at the end, though short, is very fun, starting with a couple minutes of the Thing and Dr. Doom just beating the tar out of each other and culminating with the Fantastic Four really working as a team.

Director’s Cut Note: If you have the option, see this version. There are three new scenes of note; the first showing what happened after the cloud crashed through the station and how they get back to earth, the second adding to the relationship development between Ben and Alicia so now instead of her showing up at the end as Ben’s girlfriend suddenly, we now know something of what happened between them, and a scene of Johnny coming to grips with himself and his immaturity.

Marvel Movie Score = 8

Why That?: The horrible treatment of Dr. Doom is unforgivable. Sure they did it this way to save on time, but this character deserves better. But in the end the movie just pulls it off somehow, unlike X-Men where all of its short comings are irritating to watch over and over, here they’re just easily ignored. Also aside from a couple of slightly questionable scenes this makes for a good family movie, leading to the sequel to be rated PG as they clearly have decided to make this franchise family friendly.